It is said that time is relative.

And while Albert Einstein might have been saying something profound about the nature of time and space, each of us understands that statement on a more personal level: some days race past quickly, some weeks seem to be interminable, but time marches relentlessly on.  Eventually, at the end of a month, a year, a decade -- we stop and wonder where the time has gone.

A number of us here have been able to witness the entirety of Henrik and Daniel Sedin's time in Vancouver.  We watched the young men, really still just boys at 18 years of age, pose for pictures at the 1999 NHL draft with no idea as to their future.  We watched them game in and game out, season after season, as they pursued their careers undeterred by criticism and the challenges that professional hockey players face.  Now, as they head into one final game on Saturday night, it seems as if no time has gone by at all -- and yet the teenagers from Ornskoldsvik are now fathers, pillars of the community, team record holders, and are entering retirement together with the respect of their NHL peers and fans from all over the continent and across the ocean.

It's not necessary for me to list their hockey accomplishments; many have already done so very well this past week.  However, I will commend them for the example I have seen them set with their approach to life.  I see two men of character, who determined that they would be humble and gracious in the public eye.  I see men who were grateful to the community that accepted them.  The Sedins knew that their fame gave them the unique opportunity to encourage and lift up families and children who were enduring difficult times, and so they did.  I see two professionals who were dedicated to refining their craft -- inventing new ways to play the game of hockey, honing their already considerable skills, and training to stay as fit or even to be fitter than teammates 10 or 15 years their junior.  All this they did in a city sometimes notorious for chewing up and spitting out its sports figures.  They set a standard as high as any I have seen in sport.

So what will be their legacy?

Will it be the records they set as two of the most dominant players of their generation?  The innovations they helped introduce?  The slap pass?  The cycle game?

How about this: the legacy of Henrik and Daniel Sedin will be the example they have set for those players who will come after them.  The example of how a wide-eyed, naive young hockey player can navigate the twists and turns of a pro career while remaining true to himself and to those around him.  The example of how to live as someone of character.

Of how a boy becomes a man.

The time has gone by...

...so quickly.

 Thank you, Henrik and Daniel.

Canucks and Blackhawks, Round Two!

It's Round Two...

...and it's Round Two.

This won't quite be Ali-Frazier II, but this playoff series, the second Round Two matchup in as many years between the Vancouver Canucks and the Chicago Blackhawks, has the potential to be the most intense series of this year's Stanley Cup playoffs. The Canucks had the 'Hawks on the ropes last year, but lost three straight to fall ignominiously to the canvas of playoff elimination. Strange coincidence -- Ali lost his first meeting with Frazier, too.

This year's Canucks are more experienced, a bit more skilled, and a lot more highly motivated. The Alain Vigneault-coached Canucks have not advanced past Round Two in either of their last two tries, and to go down to the 'Hawks a second year in a row would be brutal. You know there's no way this team wants to have to live with that feeling.

That having been said, this series looks to be about as even as a series can be. Both teams have highly gifted offensive players, speed and aggression on the forecheck, effective power plays, and the ability to generate offense from the blue line. Both teams have players who can get under an opponent's skin, both verbally and physically, and both teams have players who can back up the talk. Both teams have Jack Adams award-winning coaches, with Chicago coach Joel Quenneville winning in 2000 while with the St. Louis Blues, and Vigneault winning with the Canucks in 2007. Both teams are pretty hungry for a Stanley Cup, too, as the Canucks have no Cups since they entered the NHL in 1970, and the 'Hawks last win came in 1961.

As much as the series will be about each team imposing its will on the other, it'll be about avoiding the deadly mistakes. Neither team can afford to have shaky goaltending, which has been a problem for both teams this year. Canuck netminder Roberto Luongo has looked at times brilliant, and at times unfocused. Chicago goalies Antti Niemi and Cristobal Huet have been identified by many hockey observers as the weak points of the team. Neither team can afford to take untimely penalties, which will be a temptation in what will likely be an emotional series. The team that can control its energy, keep an even keel, and play consistent hockey throughout their lineup will be the team to advance.

Let's be honest; we fans have been wanting this series. We've been wanting this rematch since last May 11, as we gaped disbelievingly at our televisions while the Canucks slowly skated off the ice at the United Center. We've been wanting another crack at Kane. At Byfuglien. At Bryan Campbell. You have to believe that the Canucks have wanted this chance at payback as well.

Well, they've got it -- and so do we.

Muhammad Ali and Joe Frazier went the distance in their second fight, with both boxers having the upper hand at different times. Frazier landed harder blows, but Ali was able to land combinations and dictate the engagements during the bout. Ali won their second meeting in a unanimous decision.

Oh yeah.

This could be one of the most memorable playoff series you or I will ever see... and it all starts... tonight.

Puck drops at 5 PM!

Go Canucks Go!

The Very Model -- of a Bad Albertan Hockey Team

I don't know why I didn't think of this before; a team with players named Gilbert and O'Sullivan? Come on.

So, with the most profound of apologies to W.S. Gilbert and Arthur Sullivan, their aficionados and families, I present the following. Right-click and launch this for a MIDI accompaniment.

---

The Bad Albertan Hockey Team's Song

(by abdemarco -- to the tune of The Major-General's Song, from The Pirates of Penzance by Gilbert and Sullivan)


We are the very model of a bad Albertan hockey team
We will not make the playoffs now -- perhaps in the next century?
We haven't won a game of late, and haven't had a winning streak
In days, or weeks, or months, or years -- we can't recall how long it's been!

We're very well acquainted, too, with vet'rans running out of steam,
With injuries and lousy play -- in fact, there's a whole litany
Of reasons that we skaters give to say just why we lost again,
Perhaps the flu, the schedule, or maybe "we just have no brains."

Perhaps the flu, the schedule, or maybe "we just have no brains,"
Perhaps the flu, the schedule, or maybe "we just have no brains,"
Perhaps the flu, the schedule, or maybe "we just have no, have no brains!"

New coach Pat Quinn must really have some hypertension problems too,
"These guys aren't fit to wear the jerseys that are copper, white and blue!"
We will not make the playoffs now -- perhaps in the next century?
We are the very model of a bad Albertan hockey team.

We will not make the playoffs now -- perhaps in the next century?
We are the very model of a bad Albertan hockey team.


In signing agents that are "free", this team has had no sort of luck,
No Hossa, Vanek, Heatley, and we think, no Ilya Kovalchuk,
And why? It's not like Oiler fans aren't loads, and loads, and loads of fun;
It couldn't be that hockey players don't want to live in Edmonton!

When you sign here you think, "Alright! A team with a great history!"
But now we see those Cups are just a twenty year-old memory;
The fans aren't happy if we lose, of that we're absolutely sure,
And if you want a trade, then they'll incinerate your furniture.

And if you want a trade, then they'll incinerate your furniture.
And if you want a trade, then they'll incinerate your furniture.
And if you want a trade, then they'll incinerate your furni-furniture!

This team is near the bottom, but to last place we can't seem to fall,
And that is troubling for we'd really like to draft that Taylor Hall,
We will not make the playoffs now -- perhaps in the next century?
We are the very model of a bad Albertan hockey team.

We will not make the playoffs now -- perhaps in the next century?
We are the very model of a bad Albertan hockey team.


Some say the problem with this team, it might be psychological,
But if a team's as bad as this, it must be pathological,
Is it the fault of Tambellini, or MacT? Paul Lorieau?
Or Chrissy P? Or Daryl Katz? (Well, duh, you know it's Kevin Lowe!)

A full rebuild is what this team is needing, and it must be soon,
Get rid of every play'r and staffer in this Oiler dressing room,
We can't keep pace with Calgary, the Wild, the Avs or the Canucks.
I guess all that a guy can say is that this team just really sucks.

I guess all that a guy can say is that this team just really sucks.
I guess all that a guy can say is that this team just really sucks.
I guess all that a guy can say is that this team just really, really sucks!

Will this team ever win again? There really is no way to tell,
But I don't think that possible unless we try the AHL;
We will not make the playoffs now -- perhaps in the next century?
We are the very model of a bad Albertan hockey team.

We will not make the playoffs now -- perhaps in the next century?
We are the very model of a bad Albertan hockey team.

And so...

...it begins again.

This is the 39th time a Vancouver Canucks team has waited eagerly for the puck to drop on the start of a new NHL season. The season is a long journey. Thirty-eight times that journey has ended without a Stanley Cup championship. Will this year's trip be just the same?

Of course not!

I wouldn't dare to imply that the team will necessarily win the Cup this year. Every year has its ups, downs, twists and turns. However, this season looks markedly different from the last couple of seasons. New personnel, new styles of play, new physiques for some (yes, I'm talking about you, Steve Bernier and Kyle Wellwood).

Where will this team end up come next spring?

Strap yourselves in, it's going to be a fun ride!

Along Comes Luongo

Remember this song?

Chicago - Along Comes A Woman
Uploaded by killeraf

I figured since the Canucks face the Chicago Blackhawks in Round 2 of this year's playoffs, it might be fitting to riff on a Chicago song. So, here you have:

Along Comes Luongo
(to the tune of Along Comes a Woman, by Chicago)

My name is Toews and I thought I'd go deep in the playoffs
Deep in the playoffs, with maybe a run to the Cup

Hey Dion, you didn't much matter
And Jarome, you weren't much better
Goin' so smooth, bein' in the playoffs
For the very first time

Then along comes Luongo
There's a change in the way that I'm feeling tonight
Then along comes Luongo
And I'm not feelin' right

My name is Nicky, though some call me "Khabi" or "Bulin"
And "Bulin Wall" is a name that I'm called by my fans

Kiprusoff, he didn't much matter
Didn't care, I played so much better
Stanley Cup, name's already on it
Would this be the next time?

Then along comes Luongo
There's a change in the way that I'm playing tonight
Then along comes Luongo
And I'm not feelin' right
I'm not feelin' right (repeat chorus)

(instrumental break)

Then along comes Luongo
There's a change in the way that we're feeling tonight
Then along comes Luongo
And we're not feelin' right
We're not feelin' right (repeat & fade)

Northwest Vertigo '08

Wow, the Canucks have swept their first round series with the St. Louis Blues, and as a result actually get the luxury of a break before Round Two!

Canucks fans don't know what to do with themselves.

This is certainly a different situation than at the end of last year. Remember? The clock was winding down on another season of futility, Trevor Linden's career was drawing to a close, and the Canucks were finding a way to lose game after game as they tumbled out of the playoff picture. Here are some lyrics I wrote towards the end of the season, as the Canucks struggled gamely to make the post-season. Enjoy.


Northwest Vertigo
(to the tune of Vertigo, by U2)

Unos dos tres... catorce

[Spoken vocal over footage of Naslund]

Turn it up loud, Captain!

Games tick down, it's tense
The Northwest is so tight
We need offense
The fans they want some goals
From Dan and Hank and Nazzy and the D must score
To play their roles
Can this team go there?

Hello, hello... (Hola)
I'm at a place called Vertigo (dónde estás?)
An injury will be a big, big blow
Then we'll have to call up
Scott Arniel, Arniel

The sked is filled with games
Where every one's a must
To win or blame
Will crash on Alain V
And heads will roll
They know they've got to win
At least they know

I can’t stand the heat
I’m asking for the cheque
The girl with crimson nails
Has Louie 'round her neck
Swinging to the music Whoooaaa
Swinging to the music Whoooaaa
Whoooaaa
Whoooaaa
Whoooaaa

Hello, hello... (Hola)
I'm at a place called Vertigo (dónde estás?)
I'd love it if they'd go sixteen and oh
Then all of the fans
They would squeal, squeal

[Edge solo + video of the Stanley Cup + great Canucks plays]

All of this... all of this can be yours
All of this... all of this can be yours
All of this... all of this can be yours

Overture, Curtain, Lights!

It's been a long time since my last entry, but...

It's the playoffs, baby!

There's a cliché often used in hockey circles, that the regular season is just prologue, and that the playoffs are the "real" season. I don't think that's necessarily so, but there's no disagreeing with the fact that the playoffs are a whole different animal from the regular season. Eighty-two games played, just to get to the point of starting with a clean sheet again.

The Canucks had a great ending to their season, going on a tremendous run through February and March, culminating in their edging out the Calgary Flames for first place in the Northwest Division and home ice advantage for at least the first round. The St. Louis Blues, their first round opponents, played an awesome last few weeks too, so this series will be a challenge.

There's all sorts of great storylines to follow -- Roberto Luongo's quest for playoff success, what could be Mats Sundin's last crack at the Cup, Alex Burrows' dedication of the season to the late Luc Bourdon... it'll definitely make for great drama.

Yes, even an old fan can get excited! I am!

Go Canucks Go!

Oh, what heights we'll hit! On with the show, this is it!

Batteries -- finally!

Remember all those toy commercials on TV when you were a kid? I don't exactly, but what I remember they all seemed to have in common was a hyper announcer at the end talking about how all those cool toys were actually sold separately, and that the batteries weren't included.

Where was the fun in that?! If I was gonna own something to play with, I wanted all the pieces, and I definitely wanted the batteries.

It's like that toy car set I had -- Hot Wheels "Sizzlers", oh yeah. They were like regular Hot Wheels, except they had a little socket on the side that allowed you to plug in a wire (that looked like a gas hose) from a large power supply (that looked like a gas pump). You pressed the top of the "pump" for a while, and the little car charged up... you'd then put it on the Hot Wheels track and it'd race around by itself for a while until the juice ran out.

The only problem was that once the batteries in the "Juice Machine" died, the cars didn't run anymore. The cars didn't even roll like regular Hot Wheels, since they had these little motors in them. And the thing took like 6 D cells to work, so you can imagine how often my Dad wanted to replenish the batteries!

(Now, lest you think my Dad was some meanie who wouldn't let his little nipper have any fun, I would remind you that:

1. I did get the batteries in the first place. Yay, Dad!
2. I wouldn't be happy buying bulk packs of D cells for my kids' toys either!)

So, does "Batteries not Included" remind you at all of Mats Sundin's delay in playing for the Canucks?

Sundin is like the toy that you really, really wanted for Christmas. All the fan and media noise about whether he was coming to Vancouver, and the answering equivocation from Sundin himself, was like all those times as a kid when you'd ask your parents, "Can I have (toy of the month)?" and they'd only reply, "We'll see." Argh, the uncertainty!

When Mats announced his signing with the Canucks, though, that was opening your present on Christmas Day and seeing you'd gotten exactly what you'd been bugging Mom and Dad for, for weeks and weeks. The shiny new toy! Yes!

The delay since the signing, though, has been like what followed after reading "6 D cell batteries required" on the toy box. Six D cell batteries? Who has that many of them just lying around the house? "Sorry, son, we don't have that many batteries." The wait would then follow where daily you'd take the toy out of the box, look at it, maybe read the instructions (again), and wonder if today would be the day when Dad would be carrying three twin packs of D cells with him when he got home. Waiting for the Canucks and Sundin these last few weeks has been like having the toy but not being able to play with it.

However: tomorrow night, hopefully, is the night when Dad brings home the batteries and we finally get to see what the toy can really do.

Which toy will Mats be most like? The toy that worked great and was so fun for two days, and then broke, never to work again? Will it be the toy that looked so cool in the ads, but just like those comic book "Sea Monkeys", in real life didn't bear any resemblance to the pictures? Maybe the X-ray glasses, that didn't really work, but just messed up your eyes?

Or maybe, just maybe, Mats Sundin will be like the toy that you remember from your childhood, the one that seems only to get shinier, faster, bigger, cooler and more exciting every time you remember it and with every year that passes by. You know, the one that included the realistic Stanley Cup trophy in the box.

Only one way to tell.

Time to put in the batteries.

Mats Johan Sundin

Well, well, well! Mats Sundin has chosen, and -- he has chosen wisely. What a nice present the Canucks have found themselves with this Christmas! Hopefully, the batteries will be included, and Mats Sundin will turn out to be the impact player that many Vancouver fans are hoping for.

In honour of his signing, and in fact the whole "Sundin saga", I offer up the following song, in the spirit of the season! Enjoy!


Mats Johan Sundin
(to the tune of Frosty the Snowman)

Mats Johan Sundin,
Or just "Mats" as he was called;
He stood six-foot-five,
And weighed two-three-oh,
Had a head that you'd call "bald."

Mats Johan Sundin,
Was a fairy tale they say.
Would he just retire?
Had he lost his fire,
Or would he come back to play?

There must have been some magic
In that offer Gillis made,
'Cause J.P. Barry's eyes bugged out
When he saw what Mike would pay!

Ten million dollars --
That's some motivation now!
How could he turn down
Coming to this town
For some fun and a cash cow?

Mats Johan Sundin
Had to learn about this team.
What a travel sked!
Could he wait instead?
So he came up with this scheme:

Down to Los Angeles
Then to Sweden back he'd go,
Saying, "I need to think,
"But I'm at the rink!"
While he dreamt of all that dough.

He led them 'round, and 'round (and 'round!)
While fans said "Waiting sucks!"
Then he said, "My first choice always was
"The Vancouver Canucks!"

Mats Johan Sundin,
Won't you hurry? Come and play!
Just as you had planned,
Come to Lotus Land!
Bring the Stanley Cup our way!

Thumpety thump thump,
Thumpety thump thump,
Look at Sundin go,

Thumpety thump thump,
Thumpety thump thump,
Playing with Luongo!

Desperately Seeking Mats

There's been yet another resurgence of interest in Mats Sundin in Lotusland recently, as rumours and reports around the web have breathlessly described his undergoing a physical in Toronto, being in attendance at a Canucks game in Buffalo, starting training in LA, and showing up at a Canucks game with the Kings.

I don't know if he'll sign with Vancouver, I don't even know if he will play this season at all. I do know, though, that somewhere, someone is pining for Mats to join the Canucks. This song is for them.

Sundin
(to the tune of Something)

Sundin and the way he moves
Attracts me like no other forward
Something in the way he woos me
I don't want to leave him now,
You know I believe and how.

Somewhere in his smile he knows
That we have tons and tons of cap space
Something in his quotes that shows me.
I don't want to leave him now,
You know I believe and how.

You're asking me will my love grow,
I don't know, I don't know.
Hey, Gillis, sign him, he will show,
I don't know, I don't know.

Sundin is the answer, and he knows
And all we have to do is wait for him
Sundin is "the one", he'll show me
I don't want to leave him now,
You know I believe and how.

Game 1

What a game.

A moving tribute to Luc Bourdon.

Luongo introduced as team captain.

Offensive contributions from all over the roster.

"Team" exhibited throughout the game, as players came to each other's support.

A 6-0 spanking of the Canucks' fiercest rivals.

Bring on Game 2!

28

This is it!

It's "the night"!

Thirty-eight years have passed since the puck first dropped on a brand-new Vancouver Canucks NHL season, and tonight it happens again. All the excitement, joy, exhiliration (and rage!) that accompanies being a Canucks fan starts up again for a new season.

I thought that it might be entertaining to come up with a theme song for tonight -- kind of a musical introduction to the year. Here's what I found on YouTube:



Hm, well I hope the Canucks perform better than good old Environment Man!

Game on!

28

Pool safety rules

Where are my water wings?

The start of the NHL season is almost upon us, and so the online hockey pool drafts have begun in earnest. I've joined two online pools this season (and started one also). Prior to this year, I've only ever participated in two other season-long pools, and I am finding that there are some important drafting guidelines to learn. Here are four:

1. Read the rules? Me?

As a guy, I typically eschew reading rules and instructions. With hockey pools, though, failing to read the rules can get you way in over your head. A couple of years ago I was in a pool where faceoff wins were 1 point each. Centremen were a huge commodity, but not everyone realized that. Make sure you know how to get points in your pool!

2. You gotta choose your priorities, man.

If you don't draft live, set up your autopick list. Today I was in a draft where it was pretty obvious that one of the absentee poolies had not set up their draft list properly. Big mistake -- the server "helped" this person by auto-drafting Alex Radulov (will he even play?), Daniel Carcillo (whose main stat is penalty minutes, which don't count in our pool) and yes, I don't know how we all missed him, Miika Wiikman. What, you don't know him? Me neither!

3. Let me just look at my list, here...

It's easy to draft just based on a list of stats from previous seasons. Problem is, you have to also consider things like who that player played with, who they'll be playing with this year, how their stats were affected by injury, and so on. Use stats, yes, but look down your list for sleeper picks and also prune off those players who aren't in a good position this year.

4. Pyatt -- check, Cowan -- check, Pettinger -- check...

Don't be a homer. It's hard, but sometimes it just makes sense to pass over players from your team and to pick someone from a hated rival. Hm... Jarome Iginla or Danny Sedin? As much as I'd love to win my pool with a team brimming with Canucks, it's not likely to happen. Swallow that pride, and pick to win.

Having used these guidelines for my pool picks this year, I fully expect to win.

Yeah, right.

28

28

Brian Noonan. Wade Brookbank. Joey Kocur. Dave Capuano.

These players and others all wore the number 28 on their jerseys as Vancouver Canucks, but I doubt any of them wore it more proudly than the one who wore it most recently: the late Luc Bourdon.

I didn't own any team jerseys when I was a kid. But when playing hockey in the street out in front of my house or in the schoolyard, I often imagined myself running around with the number of a favourite player on my back. Sometimes it was Thomas Gradin's #23, sometimes Don Lever's #9, and of course Ab DeMarco's #4. I even imagined the little metal men on my table hockey set having proper team jerseys, with their names and numbers in the right places.

It's kind of weird; in real life, nobody wants to be "just a number". On the other hand, in sports, there's such a strong association between a number and the player who wears it. One of the ultimate honours for a player is to have his number retired; along with his name, his number is given a special place in team history.

With that in mind, I'd like to make a suggestion for a simple way to honour Luc Bourdon's memory. If you're reading this blog, you're probably a contributor to one of the many online forums that revolve around sports, hockey, and specifically the Canucks. My suggestion is that you and I end each of our forum posts with the number "28", up until the end of the first month of the season.

I realize that those who were close to Luc Bourdon will probably never read this blog, nor the forums that I'm talking about. I also realize that there are many other vastly more significant ways that we could remember Luc's life: making a contribution to a charity, being an advocate for motorcycle safety, or even just living life with a greater appreciation for how fleeting it can be. However, this is a simple act we can all perform, and if we do it together it will be a way that we can collectively express our respect for Luc and our sympathies for his loved ones.

A trivial action? Maybe. But it's something, and each time you type that number, perhaps you will take a moment to remember a life that ended far too soon.

28.

Mike Gillis -- for Best Director?

Whatever the month of the year, it's always hockey season in Vancouver. Even in the midst of a 30-plus degree heat wave, there's no lack of discussion about the Canucks -- what the line-up will be in the fall, which UFAs are still available, which teams might have the missing pieces we can get in a trade... it's all on the table. On the other hand, summertime is also traditionally blockbuster movie season, and so that got me thinking:

Which movie characters should Canuck GM Mike Gillis have thought about signing this off-season?

Here are some suggestions for some players I think would look great on the Canuck roster.

1. Batman from the Christopher Nolan pair of movies, enforcer. The guy knows all sorts of martial arts, and even trained on ice in the first movie. He can take a ton of punishment and get up unhurt every time. If any of us like a little fight in our players, then, well, we're gonna love him. I considered the Joker from The Dark Knight as well, but I think he'd be uncoachable and take too many undisciplined penalties.

2. Luke Skywalker from Star Wars, sniper. Here's someone who in his youth could bulls-eye womp rats in his T-16 back home. He's always shown uncanny accuracy with his shooting. His main downside would be that he's a bit of a whiner -- hopefully coach Vigneault won't interfere with Luke's trips to pick up power converters. Yoda would be good, too. His wisdom and experience could replace what we've lost in Linden's and Naslund's departures. He's pretty quick and agile for an older veteran.

3. Neo from the Matrix trilogy, PK specialist. He's amazing in outnumbered situations -- just ask Agent Smith(s). Neo also has great speed; the game seems to slow right down for him.

4. Gollum from the Lord of the Rings trilogy, agitator. With all due respect to Alex Burrows, Gollum would be the ultimate pest. Send him into the corner after the puck ("my preciousssss..."), and he will show you just what is meant by tenacious forechecking. He knows how to talk smack ("stupid fat hobbit" could be appropriate for any number of players in the NHL), and is willing to back it up with his fists if necessary. He'd have to tone down the biting thing, but on the other hand it could be helpful to have that nasty reputation. Legolas Greenleaf might be worth pursuing for an offensive upgrade, too. The man, er, elf has a deadly accurate shot and is very reliable defensively.

5. Superman from -- wait a minute, we already have Luongo locked up for the next two years.

I think Gillis would do well to pull the Sundin offer off the table and get these guys instead. Since none have played in the NHL before, he could get away with just giving them the max on entry-level contracts. He might face trouble when it becomes time to re-up, but I think the Canucks would be legitimate Cup contenders in the meantime.

That's not too much of a fantasy, is it?

The Amazing Linden-Man

"Here's the thing on men, I'm gonna give it to you now. All men think of themselves as kind of low-level super-heroes... in their own environment. When men are growing up and they're reading about Batman, Spider-Man, Superman, these aren't fantasies. These are options. This is the way men really look at their own lives. I'm not even supposed to be telling you this." -- Jerry Seinfeld, "I'm Telling You Again for the Last Time".

Jerry got it right. In his cynical and yet piercingly perceptive way, Jerry Seinfeld nailed what it is about superheroes that makes them so compelling for men. When we're just boys, we look at a character like Spider-Man and say to ourselves, "I can be just like him!".

The thing is, boys grow up. Well, at least of some of us do, but what I mean to say is this -- eventually we get to that point in our life where we come to realize we're not going to be superheroes. We come to see those fantasies for what they are.

There also comes a similar point for most of us -- and it's a very sad point, I'd like to add -- where we come to understand that we'll probably never become the sports heroes we thought we might be, either. When I hit 30 years of age I realized that I'd probably never play centre for the Canucks, throw a football for the B.C. Lions, or hit the winning home run in the World Series. All those things I imagined myself doing when I was in Grade 6, now forever out of reach.

So where does Trevor Linden fit into the picture? Let me explain.

Of all the Canucks I've admired, I feel like Linden has been the only one who I'd consider calling a Canuck "superhero". Not at all because of his hockey skills -- I mean, would you pick Trevor instead of any of these guys?

• Pavel Bure for speed.
• Markus Naslund and Geoff Courtnall for their wrist shots.
• Sami Salo for his slap shot.
• Ability to play off the body down low? Todd Bertuzzi.
• Playmaking ability? Cliff Ronning and Henrik Sedin.
• Goaltending? Duh.

If you're honest, you'll have to acknowledge that Trevor's been outdone not only in these areas, but in many hockey skill areas by different players who have worn the stick-in-rink, double-vee, downhill skate or whale on their chests.

So why the superhero status?

Well, Linden's made his career by being a "gamer". Even in his junior days, he made his mark by his effort and will on the ice more than through his raw talent. As a Canuck, he's probably most remembered for how he pushed himself through injury and exhaustion to lead the Canucks to the brink of winning the NHL's ultimate prize in the spring of 1994. In the last years of his career, we came to know him as Mr. Clutch -- the guy who you'd put on to score in the shootout, to protect the lead in the last few seconds of the third period, to score a goal to keep the team's playoff hopes alive. In short, it's been his will to compete and his character on the ice that have impressed. He's been heroic.

Even more impressive to me has been work in the community. Canuck Place, B.C. Children’s Hospital, Ronald McDonald House, Canucks for Kids -- these are just some of the causes towards which Linden has donated his time, energy, money and heart. Trevor has set the bar of community involvement for professional athletes very high -- super-high, in fact.

You could say Trevor Linden has been a superhero.

And here is the point of this article: Trevor Linden excelled as a Canuck in ways that I can honestly see myself excelling, in ways that I want to see myself excelling -- in life, not just in sport. I'll never skate like Bure, but I can give to my community. I'll never shoot a puck like Nazzy, but I can serve the underprivileged. I'll never score an overtime goal in Game 7 of the Stanley Cup Finals (sigh), but I can pour out my life for my team -- my family. And though I'll never have Linden's platform from which to demonstrate my dedication to leading or serving others, I can still make an impact where I am. You can too.

So, just like Jerry Seinfeld said, we can look at a guy like Trevor Linden and imagine that living his life isn't a fantasy -- it's an option.

You're not Peter Parker.

You're the Amazing Linden-Man.

Do the Canucks need more swedes?

Mats Sundin?

As a kid first learning about the NHL, it never occurred to me that there could be players in the league from other parts of the world. At that time, a "foreign player" would have been one of those Canadians with a fancy French name like Jocelyn Guevremont, Andre Boudrias, Rosaire Paiement or even Bobby Lalonde.

Watching and listening to more hockey, I soon found out that there were some highly skilled players from places like the Soviet Union and other places in Europe, and some of them were even in the NHL. Hockey Night in Canada had me convinced that Sweden, especially, was one of those countries where the players were so talented all your team needed was one Swede and you'd be winning the Stanley Cup in no time. Börje Salming and Inge Hammarström were proof of that, weren't they?

When the Canucks started to sign Swedish players like Thomas Gradin, Patrik Sundstrom and Lars Lindgren, I became certain that meant we'd be seeing the Cup in Vancouver soon. It didn't matter who you were as long as you were Swedish -- Lars Molin was going to do it for us!

I'm a bit less certain these days that Swedes are the answer. Oh, I'm glad that Markus Naslund played as well for the Canucks as he did, I think the Sedins will be remembered as two of the best Canuck talents of all time and I also believe that Alex Edler will have a very good career as a defenseman, but I just don't think that adding more Swedes is the answer.

Adding more swedes, though -- how about that?

A few years ago, I overheard some English relatives of mine talking about swedes as if they were food. I knew they weren't cannibals, so I had to find out what they meant. It turns out that swede is the name that folks in the U.K. use to refer to rutabagas. You know, those big whitish turnip-type root vegetables that give children food nightmares. Looking on Wikipedia reveals that:

1. In the U.K., before pumpkins were commonly available, swedes used to be carved out for jack o'lanterns.
2. In continental Europe during World War I, swedes gained a reputation as the food you'd eat only if you had nothing else left to eat.
3. A curling championship is held annually in the U.S. where swedes are used as curling rocks.
4. In the Scots language, swedes are called "neeps". I love that word!
5. Ingesting too many swedes can lower your thyroid activity, which can make you lethargic and depressed.

So then! Now that you are a bit more educated about swedes, let me ask you this: how much do you really want to see Mats Sundin in a Canucks uniform?

The Ryan Smyth Song

One of the places I spend a lot of time is on the Canucks Forum hosted at sportsnet.ca. There's already enough impassioned expression there, so what I enjoy adding are posts that will hopefully make people chuckle a bit. One of the ways I have done that is by posting hockey-themed parody lyrics of popular songs.

Here's some lyrics I wrote around the trade deadline in February 2007, when Edmonton's Ryan Smyth was traded to the New York Islanders and subsequently gave an emotional news conference. The trade coincided with the date of Mark Messier's jersey retirement in Edmonton where Messier skated around the rink holding the Stanley Cup, much to the chagrin of many hockey fans. The chagrin was amplified in sportsnet.ca's quarters, as one of Sportsnet's pro-Oiler bloggers nicknamed "Big Dude" had recently railed against the practice of players showing off the Cup when they were not the current NHL champions.

Of course, the Oilers had suffered losing in the Cup finals the year before and also suffered losing Chris Pronger to his demanded trade in the summer of '06.

Enjoy.


The Ryan Smyth Song
(to the tune of American Pie)

A long, long time ago...I can still remember
How Ninety-Four used to make me smile.
And I knew if they had their chance
The Oil could make those people dance
And, maybe they’d be happy for a while.

But February made me shiver
With every paper I’d deliver.
Bad news on the doorstep;
I couldn’t take one more step.

I can’t remember if I cried
When I read about the trade deadline,
But something touched me deep inside
The day The Mullet died.

So bye-bye, to this year's playoff drive.
Don't have Pronger any longer,
Or that Mike Peca guy.
Now them roughneck boys are drinkin’ whiskey and rye
Singin’, "Did you see that Ryan Smyth cry?
"Did you see that Ryan Smyth cry?"

Did you think we'd go all the way,
After watching Rollie play,
In the playoffs of last year?
Did you believe in Marc-Andre,
Was Pisani worth that extra pay,
And were the Oilers this year's team to fear?

Well, I know you love that long hairstyle
You've had that 'do for quite a while,
He made those goalies fret
By banging and crashing the net.

I was a lonely teenage broncin’ buck
With a red, red neck and a pickup truck,
But I knew I was out of luck
The day The Mullet died.

I started singin’,
"Bye-bye" to this year's playoff drive.
Don't have Pronger any longer,
Or that Mike Peca guy.
Now us roughneck boys are drinkin’ whiskey and rye
Singin’, "Did you see that Ryan Smyth cry?
"Did you see that Ryan Smyth cry?"

For seventeen years we’ve had no Cup
And very, very, very little drafting luck
But that’s not how it used to be.
Then Messier came to have his number hung
In an old-time jersey with his praises sung
In a voice that came from you and me,

Oh, and while Big Dude was looking down,
The Cup was lifted and skated 'round,
Other fans were amused to see
Such blatant hypocrisy.

And while the Moose was shedding tears,
GM Lowe was avoiding jeers
By cowering underneath the arena tiers,
The day The Mullet died.

We were singing,
"Bye-bye", to this year's playoff drive.
Don't have Pronger any longer,
Or that Mike Peca guy.
Now us roughneck boys are drinkin’ whiskey and rye
Singin’, "Did you see that Ryan Smyth cry?
"Did you see that Ryan Smyth cry?"

I thought we'd get a D-man from the Blues
For some happy deadline news,
But that chance just upped and went away.
I went down to the Rexall rink
Where I hoped to see a team that didn't stink
But a fan there said Smytty wouldn't play.

And in the streets: the children screamed,
The lovers cried, and the poets dreamed.
But not a word was spoken;
MacT's boys were broken.
Now's there's guys I want to roast:
The owners, the coach, but KLowe most;
Now the Cup's headed for the coast (!)
Now The Mullet's died.

And they were singing,
"Bye-bye", to this year's playoff drive.
Don't have Pronger any longer,
Or that Mike Peca guy.
Now them roughneck boys are drinkin’ whiskey and rye
Singin’, "Did you see that Ryan Smyth cry?
"Did you see that Ryan Smyth cry?"

They were singing,
"Bye-bye", to this year's playoff drive.
Don't have Pronger any longer,
Or that Mike Peca guy.
Now them roughneck boys are drinkin’ whiskey and rye
Singin’, "Did you see that Ryan Smyth cry?"

Who am I, what is this, and why is this?

I'm a big-time fan of the Vancouver Canucks.

Really.

Don't be sorry for me, though.

Over the years, I've seen them at their best, at their worst, and everywhere in between. I've been elated when they've won and depressed when they've lost. I've been excited at their potential and frustrated at their mediocrity.

As I've grown older, I've come to realize I'm not as fanatical as I used to be. Don't get me wrong - I'm still a big fan, and from time to time I still get overly worked up about how they do, but life doesn't begin and end with each game. I've also come to realize, however, that there are a lot of other fans out there who are more fanatical than I ever was. You can find those fans all over the web.

Here, I'm going to try to build something different. A blog for Canucks fans who are ardent, but just more moderate. Where humour, objectivity and patience will hopefully rule, and hair-pulling, ranting and raving will hopefully be kept to a minimum.

Let's see how long this lasts!